When many people think of love, they think of all the positive images associated with the feeling. People imagine having children, marriage, bliss and being optimistic about ones life. We dream of dancing, having sex, wine, music, dreams and hopes of a romance. But what about the other part of love? When our ego states ownership over another person and becomes possessive? Or when someone feels love, but the love is blocked and is not returned? In these cases, love has the potential to turn from a positive experience into a negative one. This can shift the feeling of love from being optomist into becoming suppressive and/or jealous. Love combined with rejection and ego can become dangerous based on the circumstances. Therefore, we must remember that love has the potential to be dark just as it has the potential to be light.
Romeo and Juliet is a love story that we can use to illustrate the negative effects of love. This was a story of a forbidden love due to the parents of the couple not approving their union. Their love for each other was so deep, they committed suicide because they desired love to the extent of death. Most people, obviously, will not express love to the the extent of committing suicide per say, but you get the point- love has a dark side. Also, because love is such an intense emotion, it can overcome our logic at times and make us do things that may seem 'crazy' or 'delusional'. This is when we can become borderline insane with our actions and sometimes we convince our egos and logic reasons for our delusions. I am sure you have seen couples who love each other so much their fights are explosively negative just as their romance (and I would assume sex) is explosively passionate. Once we realize that love is neutral, will we truly understand how to handle and deal with it accordingly.
Because we tend to define love as always being positive and never negative, we loose the full experience of it and the gift of healing it has to offers. It is natural to sometimes fall in love with someone you didn't expect, just as it is natural to feel jealousy and anger after a romantic breakup. These emotions are a part of us and our experience for a reason. They are there to help us and our spiritual evolution. They are not there to be suppress and/or make us feel guilty about ourselves. If you suppress and never analyze these emotions, you will never heal yourself and can potentially create more pain within yourself which will stop your spiritual growth. These emotions are there to help us look within ourselves to analyze our internal wounds and the orgins of these feelings. So instead of judging ourselves and others for feeling this way, we should realize these are souls or people who are in need of healing. In our current society, everyone wants to be perfect and optimistic with no flaws. But we can't be optimistic if we keep hiding our pains within ourselves. Yes, we can hide our pain for a length of time, but eventually they will manifest when you least expected... to be healed. I suggest healing them now on your own time, instead dealing with it unexpectingly. Only then can you take control of your cross roads and life lessons and truly see the value of love.
By Makalesi Rodan